Enhancing your communication skills

You already know that the 'L' in NLP refers to 'linguistic' and speaking to you as a business trainer with a specialism in communications training, many people who hear that they can be trained in 'communication enhancement' often wonder exactly what that means?

As if you didn't know already, language is an extremely powerful tool in business and understanding now that there are techniques, structures and patterns contained within it, that when used in a certain way, do enable a person who chooses to use language in this way to 'steer' a persons thought processing towards the desired outcome for that conversation.

Breaking down language to understand its effects

For most, these patterns are used daily, but without any understanding of, or appreciation of what and how they are doing and how they get their results. Others get by in business by using their own unique style, jargon and patterning and sometimes they attain the desired result, sometimes they don't. So, what would it be like if you could break down language, understand the 'effects' it has on a person and then be able to choose to use particular patterns in the contexts in which you want a particular result such as presenting and sales or management of employees? I'm sure you'd agree that on one hand that might appear 'advantageous' and you might even ask what are these 'patterns' and structures?

Contained within the Milton Model (Bandler and Grinder) are a number of language patterns that primarily contain what are referred to as 'deletions, distortions and generalisations'. Bandler and Grinder created the Milton Model as a result of 'modelling' the language used by Milton Erickson, a clinical hypnotherapist who got results with clients that leading psychiatrists of the era had, for whatever reason, not achieved the desired outcomes for their patients. His methods of working with his clients utilised language to 'connect with a persons unconscious mind' enabling the unconscious mind of the client to access, process and accept the information given to them in such a way that 'change' occured in the person at a 'deep level'. As a result, unconscious changes in their behaviour meant that they overcame personal issues as they created new choices for themselves that they would not have been able to access if not for Ericksons method of communicating. But what does this mean in business terms?

Sender - Message - Recipient

There is no doubt that 'communication' contains the following elements, 'sender, message and recipient.' Whilst in conversation with another, you'll have noticed from previous experience that your conversations are 'engaging' or otherwise and your ability to hold a conversation with another to create the level of interest, desire and action associated with your preferred outcome requires the use of language. The conditions for creating an environment whereby the receiver of the communication is allowed to connect with you and synchronise themselves to what it is you are saying can be created using language, the term used to describe this is 'pacing' and the term used to describe how you move someone towards your train of thought is 'leading.' By pacing, you create language patterns that a person a person only agrees with.

E.g, As you are reading this blog, taking in the information in a way that is best for you, making mental notes of the information, storing that information in your mind.....

Creating agreement frames

The above example contains language that cannot be disagreed with. Everything in the sentence is actually going on and your 'current experience' was being paced, by using language.

Leading is the next stage in the process to direct the persons attention towards what it is you are looking to communicate/discuss/achieve.

E.g, As you are reading this blog, taking in the information in a way that is best for you, making mental notes of the information, storing that information in your mind....."you might want to consider how an improvement in your own communication skills would benefit you and your business"

Now we are veering towards the desired outcome of the conversation - how 'enhancing your communication skills would benefit you in business.'

It's just another way of communicating, that's all!

Don't get me wrong, people do get by making statements and requests by getting straight to the point. Sometimes this is 'accepted' by the receiver, sometimes it isn't. By pacing and leading people in conversations one can ensure that they have the persons full attention, commitment and agreement to communicate before the 'steer' or leading moves them towards the real message contained within the communication.

Having read this information and now thinking about how you communicate and the results you get, start to wonder about how some subtle changes in how you approach your communication could improve your relationship management, sales and presenting skills and how that may enable you to achieve bigger and better results.